Strap in folks because there's a new sneaky tactic we women-folk are using to catch men out in their cheating ways... and I'm going to be honest, it's a little dark.
In fact, it kinda makes me feel dirty.
I came across this trickery late one night when I was scrolling my current obsession - a Facebook page called 'Sis, is this your man'. It allows women to upload pictures of the men they are currently dating or chatting to on dating apps, to see if anyone else is dating them. It's wild!
No that isn't the dating tactic… read on, dear reader, read on.
There are hundreds of these pages on Facebook and they are all set to specific locations. So I follow the Sydney edition.
Safe to say, there are always dramas on there with women constantly shocked to find out the guy they thought they were dating exclusively had hooked up with three other women in the last month. On a particularly juicy night you'll discover a guy on there who is married. I know, scandalous.
Strap in folks because there's a new sneaky tactic we women-folk are using to catch men out in their cheating ways... and I'm going to be honest, it's a little dark...
Lately I've noticed that the site has gotten a little dark, with women on there now asking for volunteers to 'honey trap' their men
It's my guilty pleasure and it never disappoints. I mean, it sure will put you off dating but it's good way to spark up a dull night. Lately however, I've noticed that the site has gotten a little dark, with women on there now asking for volunteers to 'honey trap' their men.
Now if you don't know what a honey trap is, then pour yourself a wine and prepare yourself for an education. A honey trap is defined as an investigative technique that tests the fidelity of a spouse or significant other by attempting to lure them into a romantic situation while simultaneously gathering evidence.
A woman would intentionally send another attractive woman to a bar they know there boyfriend is at and get the woman to flirt with him to see if he takes the bait. Or they would ask a friend who doesn't know their fella to slide into his DMs with a flirty message and see if he responds.
This then tests his fidelity. I know, evil. And let's be honest this trap is bound to end in tears.
This woman conducted a loyalty test on another woman's boyfriend of one year. He told her he was single after she told him she saw him on dating site Raya. The girlfriend was heartbroken and said she was 'ready to dump him'. It's not known if she went ahead and ended things
This boyfriend was honey trapped by his girlfriend. He said his relationship 'had its moments' and then a few hours later messaged again telling the attractive stranger she was 'quite cute'. The girlfriend left him the next day and the 'honey trapper' blocked him immediately
But I realised I've been accidentally doing it for months. You see I have a really gorgeous friend who often comes out with me. The number of times a guy I have been casually dating has then started following her and slid into her DMs after she meets him is outrageous.
Spoiler alert: Three. It's happened three times. Thank you… next!
But I've never considered doing it intentionally. I'm one of those people who much prefers to live in denial and then be mock shocked when they get caught - because trust me they always get caught. Just have a read of my Monday night Saucy Secrets on Instagram and you'll be sneak peeking on your partner's phone within seconds.
So, I wanted to know how these honey traps play out and if they are actually that common. I took to my Instagram and asked followers: Have you ever used someone to 'honeytrap' your partner? Or Have you ever been the 'honey trap?.'
Well, turns out it's pretty darn common. My inbox provided some horrifying stories so let me share them with you:
One guy told me he had been on the receiving end of a honey trap and it ended up backfiring on his girlfriend
This man 's mate was honey trapped by his wife on a night out; it didn't end well for either of them
One guy wrote: 'I was on a footy trip once when one of the guys went home with a girl, but once he got back to her house he was greeted by his wife on the phone. She had used a friend to trap him.
I instantly wrote back: 'Oh wow! Did they break up? What did her friend say to him after the phone call?'
He replied:' It was a few years ago now. I'm pretty sure she stayed with him for a bit. Which I found odd. She got the answer she was looking for then didn't do anything about it. I think he got called every name under the sun. He came back to the pub we were at looking very sheepish. He didn't get any sympathy from anyone. Spent the rest of the night on the phone to his mrs trying to get her to believe some made up story.'
Then I got another guy tell me he had been on the receiving end of a honey trap and it ended up backfiring on his girlfriend.
'I have been on the receiving end of a honey trap which I passed. It put me in a horrible position where I had to tell the girlfriend that her life long best friend had tried to make a move on me. When I did she saw it as a huge relief and came clean that I passed the test. That little game opened my eyes and was the end of the relationship for me,' he said.
READ MORE: I told a young girlfriend to keep secret the five-year affair she was having with a married man
<!- - ad: https://mads.dailymail.co.uk/v8/us/femail/none/article/other/mpu_factbox.html?id=mpu_factbox_1 - ->AdvertisementAnother woman in my DMs revealed she set a honey trap.
'I trusted a gut feeling years ago during the Ashley Madison data hack. I set up a fake profile and found my (now ex) husband's profile on the 'married dating' website. I proceeded to send him a message asking for photos to which he agreed… complete with a d**k pic. He denied it all even after I told him I had proof. I divorced him as quick as I could. Always trust your gut,' she said.
Now I give these women's props for getting creative when it came to spying on their men, but I think the paranoia would eat me alive. I prefer to date in a 'let's just give it a go until one of us bows out' kinda way.
It can't be healthy to constantly be living in a state of fear that your man could cheat. If your gut says he's cheating, it's usually because there are red flags flying early. Instead of setting up traps how about you just follow your gut and move on.
I mean don't get me wrong I love reading about it but isn't dating supposed to be fun? Sheesh, it's gotten dark lately.
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